Valentine's Chocolate Massacre
by Cecil Murdock
Summary: Valentine's Day is right around the corner, and Fuuka wants to make an impression and impress Shinjiro. Things... don't go as planned. One shot comedy/romance (There's no actual massacre it's figurative xP)


**Saturday 2/09**

Fuuka crept into the kitchen area of the dorm, silently, so as not to be noticed. It was late, almost midnight, so she felt fairly certain that no one would notice what she was doing. She had seen to it personally, and disabled the camera that covered this part of the dorm. She doubted that anyone would be checking the tapes, but she had wanted to be sure. Fuuka rested a large paper bag she'd been keeping in her room on the counter, and went to the cabinet to find a large mixing bowl and some pots.

Valentine's Day was less than a week away, and she had decided that this was her chance. She could show Shinjiro-san her feelings, and also how much she had learned from him and all his careful instruction in the kitchen. She would make him chocolate that would encompass all of those goals, for sure, even if it took a few tries.

Fuuka shook her head. There was no sense thinking negatively like that. She was going to succeed for sure. Fuuka set her small laptop on a free stretch of counter, bringing up the page with the recipe and instructions that she'd acquired. She had decided not to do anything extravagant, but it was still going to be a real challenge for her. Fuuka had proven capable in the past of turning even a simple pot of boiling water into a localized disaster.

"Boiling water, right, first I need to melt the chocolate with a double boiler pot... but I don't have one of those, so I'll have to just have to find two pots that are about the same size I guess?" Fuuka searched until she found two similarly sized pots. She filled one half-way with water, and set the other precariously on top of it, placing squares of unsweetened-chocolate in the top pot and turning the heat on.

"Okay, now I just have to wait for that to melt. I'll need some sugar for the next part... where did I put the sugar I had? Maybe it wasn't in the bag and I left it down here somewhere," Fuuka said to herself. She found that she had a better time staying collected while working if she spoke the steps out loud.

Fuuka rummaged through cabinets, searching for the sugar. After several minutes she finally found a container filled with fine white powder. By that time, the contents of the top pot had begun to smoke, and a pungent odor filled the area.

"Oh no it's burning! I have to turn the heat down... and where's my measuring cup. I have to add the sugar," Fuuka measured out the white powder and dumped it into the pot. After several minutes stirring the mixture began to thicken substantially, congealing into a light brown sludge that strongly resembled mud.

"I don't understand, it's not supposed to be doing that! Did I put in too much sugar?" Fuuka tasted the white powder, and gasped in horror, "This is flour! Oh no, I should have checked first. I thought it was clumping up oddly for sugar."

Fuuka turned the heat off and the brown mass began to cool, until it vaguely resembled baked clay. A smoky, burned scent lingered in the air.

"What're you doing down here at this time of night Fuuka?" A voice from behind her said.

Fuuka jumped in surprise and turned around, with a guilty expression on her face. The voice had been Akihiko, who had clearly just come in from a late night run.

"Oh Akihiko-senpai, I uh, I was just making a midnight snack. You know how it is; sometimes you just get hungry when you're up working late!" Fuuka said, laughing nervously.

"Right... well it smells like it got burned. You should be more careful next time, don't want something dangerous to happen," Akihiko said, before heading up to his room.

Fuuka let out a sigh of relief, having avoided being caught, but then turned with dismay to the ruined remains of her first attempt. Not only was it not remotely edible, but Fuuka wasn't sure she would be able to scrape the pot clean with anything short of an industrial solvent. She would have to try though, to make sure there was no evidence of her culinary disaster. She would have to try again the next night.

**Monday 2/11**

Sunday had been a wash. The lounge on the first floor of the dorm had been occupied until late in the evening by Ken and Junpei, who had been playing some new video game on the TV while Aigis and Koromaru watched. Tonight though, no one had come anywhere near the lounge since before nine. Fuuka had been using her persona, Juno, to make sure of that. Everyone was occupied in their own rooms, leaving Fuuka in peace to mount her second attempt at chocolate making. This time she had borrowed nesting boiler pots from the home-ec room at school. She had also made sure to taste the sugar before adding it to anything.

The chocolate was melted without incident, and Fuuka added the sugar.

"Well maybe it couldn't hurt to add a little more. After all chocolate's supposed to be sweet! I'm also supposed to add milk? I knew I forgot something at the convenience store. What do I have in the refrigerator here?" Fuuka searched for a moment, before closing the door, holding a small carton.

"Well it isn't milk, but non-dairy creamer is used for the same thing right? That should probably work alright," Fuuka said, pouring a measure of the creamer into the mixture.

The mixture began to boil, and Fuuka realized she hadn't reduced the heat when she was supposed to. A disconcertingly tangy scent was issuing from the mixture. Fuuka reduced the heat, but worried that it might be too late. A thin film had formed over the top of the mixture, and it refused to congeal. Something was definitely wrong.

"It doesn't seem to be setting... maybe the creamer wasn't such a good idea after all. Maybe I should... taste...it?" Fuuka eyed the pot uncertainly.

A bark from underfoot startled Fuuka, and she dropped the spoon she'd been using to stir the mix. Koromaru had sneaked his way into the kitchen area, no doubt curious as to what Fuuka was up to. He sniffed the spoon curiously, but immediately recoiled, his ears flat against his head, in fear and alarm. He whimpered piteously as he backed further away.

"That bad huh Koro-chan? It's looking like another failed attempt. I really need to plan things out better, I always forget to and then end up making a mistake," Fuuka said, crestfallen.

Koromaru barked encouragement, and Fuuka smiled, "You're right, this was still better than last time. I'll get it right next time for sure!"

**Tuesday 2/12**

It was late in the afternoon and Fuuka was at the convenience store near the dorm. She had needed to re-purchase a number of ingredients, having literally burned through them in her first two attempts. Fuuka was grabbing some milk when a girl addressed her from behind.

"Oh, hey Fuuka, doing some shopping for the dorm?" Yukari said. This year the two of them had been placed in the same class, and so they had become better friends. Still, Fuuka's chocolate mission was a secret even from her. Fuuka had always been a little envious of Yukari: she was athletic, and had a sharp sense of fashion, and was very popular at school. Even just wearing her pink sweater over her uniform, Yukari struck a figure that made Fuuka feel envious.

Fuuka glanced around nervously, "Ah, um yes, I just thought it would be nice to pick up some essentials you know. What brings you here Yukari-san?"

"I thought I should buy some chocolate for everyone, but I don't have very much money. Don't get me wrong, I don't have anyone special in mind, I just thought I'd get some for everyone to share. I guess I'm really going to have to go to the sweet shop at the strip mall though. It was worth a shot," Yukari said.

"Ah yeah, I hadn't even thought about Valentine's Day, how forgetful of me," Fuuka said.

"Well if you don't have a boyfriend it isn't a big deal, not like we're in grade school and need to give chocolate to everyone. I just felt like it would be nice," Yukari said.

"Yes that is very thoughtful of you Yukari-san! I'm sure everyone will be happy," Fuuka said.

"I just hope that Stupei doesn't take it the wrong way," Yukari said, rolling her eyes.

"Anyway, I'll see you later Fuuka!" Yukari left the store, and Fuuka sighed. Her purpose remained secret, but she was running out of time.

The rest of the evening presented no opportunities for a third attempt at Valentine's chocolate. Mitsuru was present in the lounge reading, Yukari was studying at the table near the kitchen area, and Aigis appeared to be having an animated conversation with Koromaru. Fuuka watched all this from behind the screen of her laptop, realizing with increasing dismay that she would need to make her final attempt the day before Valentine's.

**Wednesday 2/13**

Fuuka suffered from mounting nerves throughout the day. There could be no retreat tonight; she would wait as long as necessary, even if she ended up working straight through the night. Fortunately that didn't look like it was going to happen. The lobby was devoid of people after nine, when Akihiko left for a long distance run. He was extremely serious about training, and wouldn't be back for at least several hours. Fuuka once again made her preparations, after verifying the location of everyone else in the dorm. As she laid out the last of her ingredients, she heard footsteps descending down the stairs, and began hurriedly considering a variety of plausible excuses for her activity. After a moment, Aigis emerged from the stairwell, still wearing her school uniform. She surveyed the various ingredients and cooking implements, and then regarded Fuuka.

"Fuuka-san, you seem to be in the midst of serious preparation. What have you been attempting all week that requires such secrecy?" Aigis asked.

Fuuka felt her face flush, "Have you been watching me the whole time?"

"No, but I have been noting your presence in the kitchen this week, usually late at night and only when no one else is present. It was from these parameters that I determined you were attempting to conceal your activity," Aigis said.

"Well I guess there's no sense trying to hide it then, I've been trying to make chocolate for Valentine's Day all week, but it... hasn't been going too well," Fuuka said sheepishly.

"I am familiar with this custom, girls give chocolate to boys that they are fond of, and those boys give gifts in return on White Day. This pattern is specific to Japan, and very different from the way the holiday is celebrated in the United States," Aigis reeled off facts to Fuuka.

"Right, um that's what I've been trying to do," Fuuka said.

"For whom is this chocolate intended Fuuka-san?" Aigis finally asked the question Fuuka had been hoping to avoid.

"Um... well, Shinjiro-senpai actually," Fuuka finally said, her face burning.

"I see. You seem determined, so I will assist you Fuuka-san. I am not specifically versed in culinary skills, but surely two people should more easily accomplish this task than one," Aigis said.

"Okay, that _does _seem to make sense certainly. I'm going to begin melting the chocolate, could you pre-measure some of the other ingredients? There's a list of them on my laptop over on the counter," Fuuka said.

"Affirmative," Aigis said, moving to the counter. Fuuka thought silently that perhaps now, with help, she could finally get things right.

For a third time, Fuuka went through the process of melting down the chocolate, then adding various ingredients, this time being sure that they were what she thought they were. She was even careful to closely monitor the heat.

"Okay, I should probably get working on making the icing... oh no, I left some of the things I bought for that in my room. Aigis, can you make sure the chocolate is well mixed while I go get them?" Fuuka said.

"That will not be a problem. Everything is proceeding as per the instructions," Aigis said. Fuuka rushed back up the stairs to her room.

When Fuuka returned downstairs, she knew something was wrong immediately. Aigis was standing near the counter, spattered with chocolate, and to her horror, Fuuka could see that the rest of the kitchen was also covered in chocolate.

"Oh no, Aigis what happened?" Fuuka said.

Aigis looked crestfallen, "I am so sorry Fuuka-san, the instructions said to stir the chocolate vigorously, but I fear that my high-capacity servos were too potent. They allow my hands to reach a maximum rotation rate of 30,000 rotations per minute. I believe that may have been too many."

Fuuka inspected the pot where the chocolate had been only minutes before. It sat next to the stove, but had obviously been knocked onto the floor by the fury of Aigis' mixing. Fuuka regarded what little was left in dismay.

"Well there might be enough left in here to still make a smaller chocolate. I'll just have to ice it especially well to make up for the lacking size," Fuuka said.

Fuuka replaced the pot on the burner, and turned the heat back on to soften the chocolate back up. She then set about measuring ingredients for her icing. She stopped when she smelled the now familiar scent of something burning. Some of the chocolate had spilled onto the burner, and had now burst into actual flames on the stove, licking in bright yellows and oranges around the pot. A smoke alarm began to sound.

"Oh no! Aigis get some water to put the flames out!" Fuuka quickly turned the burner off.

"Engaging fire containment procedures," Aigis said, the rotors on within her hairband spinning at high-speeds.

Aigis aimed her hands at the stove, the ends of her fingers opening to douse the area in flame-retardant foam. Fuuka could only watch in horror as the entire area was coated. She heard the rush of feet down the stairs, and soon the lobby was filled with the other residents of the former S.E.E.S. Dorm.

"Holy hell, what happened down here?" Shinjiro said. Fuuka thought if she was lucky, her embarrassment might kill her.

"There was a minor fire. The situation is now under control," Aigis said.

"Really, because it doesn't _look_ under control," Junpei said, wearing an expression of clear amusement.

"Yamagishi, what exactly were you trying to do here?" Mitsuru asked.

"I... um I mean... uh," Fuuka looked around frantically, trying to come up with a convincing lie.

Shinjiro took in the kitchen, surveying the wreckage for a moment before speaking again, "She was clearly trying to cook something and let it get out of hand. Let's just drop it, okay Mitsuru? I'll help her clean up." His tone indicated that this was the end of the discussion.

Mitsuru regarded him levelly, "Well so long as it gets cleaned up. I need to get back to my studies at any rate. I'll trust you to take care of this," she said, before leaving the lobby.

"I will help as well, this is after all my fault," Aigis said, sounding regretful.

"Do you need any more help?" Yukari asked.

Fuuka shook her head glumly, "No, it's okay, the three of us can handle it, really, but thank you Yukari-san."

"Okay then, let me know if you _do_ though. Come on Junpei, no need to gawk, unless you want to help?" Yukari said reproachfully.

"Aahhh, no thanks, I'm sure they've got it in hand," Yukari and Junpei left the lobby as well.

"Well, let's get to it then, I'll go get some towels and a mop and bucket. This is going to take a while to clean," Shinjiro said.

Together, the three of them spent the next several hours cleaning the kitchen, during which time Akihiko returned from his workout, not asking what had happened after a warning look from Shinjiro. Fuuka felt on the verge of tears, this was a total disaster.

When they had finished, Fuuka retreated to the couches in the first floor lounge, sagging with exhaustion against the cushions. Aigis returned to her room, after furiously apologizing several more times. Shinjiro sat in an arm chair in the lounge, with Koromaru sitting at his feet.

"Thank you so much for all your help Shinjiro-senpai... I'm sorry about all of this, really. This was not how I'd hoped things would go," Fuuka said.

"If you were going to try something as complicated as making home-made chocolates, you should have asked me for help. You can barely boil noodles alone without it becoming a crisis situation," Shinjiro said.

"What?! That wasn't... I didn't-" Fuuka stammered.

"Come on, I just spent the past two hours cleaning chocolate off every surface in the kitchen. Besides Aki mentioned the other night that you were down here burning food, and I overheard Aigis talking to Koro-chan about you ruining chocolate. If you were that determined I would've helped if you asked," Shinjiro said in a less reproachful tone.

"But I couldn't! The chocolate was supposed to be for you," Fuuka said in a small voice.

Shinjiro looked shocked and looked away, red-faced, "Wha-? Why would you want to do something like that?"

"Because I...I really like you Shinjiro-san! I admire how you're strong, but also kind. You try to hide it, but I can tell how much you care for everyone, and you're always worried about our welfare. You even try to help me with my cooking all the time, even though I'm hopeless. I wanted to make this for you to show how much I appreciated everything you do for us... and for me," Fuuka burst out.

"You don't have to do something like that all on your own, I'm not worth the trouble," Shinjiro said.

"Yes you are! You can't value yourself so little like that! You were ready to die for a single mistake you made, without even thinking of how we would feel! How I felt! Shinjiro-san, I was so afraid you wouldn't wake up, because I love you!" Fuuka clapped her hands over her mouth. She couldn't believe she'd just confessed for real.

"Jeez, coming out with all that, you've really gotten a lot more assertive after all," Shinjiro wasn't making eye contact.

"I realized all that after the fact. I thought that there was something I had to do, and that was the only way, but I realized I was wrong. Dying won't make up for anything, only living will. I didn't know you felt that way though. Are you sure you want to be saying those sorts of things to a no good guy like me?" Shinjiro said.

"Of course I'm sure! I just told you how I felt about you, so don't have such a low opinion of the person I love," Fuuka practically shouted.

"Alright, I get it, I'll be more careful from now on. I know it's weird but, why don't we make some chocolates together instead? I mean... wouldn't it be more fun to do it together anyway?" Shinjiro said.

Fuuka gasped, and then nodded, "Yes, I would like that very much!"

Shinjiro stood up from his chair, "Alright then, it's a deal. We'll go shopping tomorrow and work on it tomorrow night.

Fuuka stood up and grabbed hold of Shinjiro's coat sleeve to stop him, "Um, that is... are you sure that's how you want to spend your Valentine's Day?"

Shinjiro turned and Fuuka was shocked as he wrapped her in a warm embrace. She could feel a gentle strength in his arms, and returned the hug, feeling secure and floating with contentment. She thought she might faint.

"Of course I'm sure, don't be stupid! I mean, I haven't just been helping you with your cooking and things just to kill time. You're so honest and enthusiastic, always trying to help everyone... what I mean to say is maybe I uh..." Shinjiro faltered.

"I guess I love you too," he said.

Fuuka felt like she couldn't catch her breath. She buried her face in Shinjiro's pea-coat, so he couldn't see the tears in her eyes, but somehow he could still tell.

"Geez, I didn't say anything to cry about come on," Shinjiro said softly.

Fuuka laughed, "I'm sorry, you're right I don't know what's the matter with me. I'm just surprised. It's a date then."

"Yeah, it's a date," Shinjiro said.


End file.
